Hazen the world traveler

Sitting in alex's new volkswagen
Hazen "this feels so fucking European"

Formspring

Formspring has 3 purposes
1. Being mean to people
2. Telling people you find them attractive
3. Starting shit with people by pretending you're someone else.

Unless your Hazen, if you're Hazen you use formspring to try and find love. Hazen on formspring is a completely different person than hazen in real life(irl)...

Examples

I have thought you were cute even before you were at Edgewater, you came for some orientation. And I was like 'there is a cutie.' But timing has never been right and I am shy.

aaaaaww thats sweet you should talk to me :D

Tis okay, i understand :):) I see you all the time but for some reason i never say hi, haha i feel like it would be weird and you would be like "..um hi."

well next time say hi because i wouldnt say ..."um hi" to youuuuuu :)


and he uses it to just be Hazen on occasion 

I will cut you with a straight edge because it will be ironic.

HA.HA.HA GOOD ONE you sound like someone who needs a nose job which i can help you with.Me and my handy dandy hammer

Reckless Exaggeration

Hazen: WOW look at that amazing man. He’s sitting in an bad ass car and smoking a cigar.
Alex: Hazen thats just some guy sitting in a convertable smoking a ciggerette.
Hazen: WOW now he's drinking out of a possible flask!!!
Alex: Hazen thats deff just a coffee cup.
Hazen:AHHHHHHHHHH. I COULDN'T TELL OK
Fischer: LOOK AT HIS MONOCLE AND HE HAS A BIG CHETTAH IN THE SEAT NEXT TO HIM!!!!!!!!!
Hazen: Shut up i couldn't tell...AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Strength of Hand

Hazen: I have strong hands, I grew up pulling weeds.

Hazen QOTD

Alex: Oh my god its so warm in here.
Hazen: Its like a toasty cottage.


Hazen: Just for girls ( referring to Justice for Girls)...LIKE MY FIST.

I don't really know what happened here. Hazen started praising satan and hardcore dancing completely out of the blue.

Conversations with Hazen

Me: "I watched Rocky Horror Picture Show last night. I love that movie."

Hazen: "I didn't like that movie so much."

Me: "Oh. Well it's one of my favorites."

Hazen: "Was that the one with the russian? I liked the first one better."

Me: I think you're talking about the Rocky movies."

Both: "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH."